Sunday, July 3, 2011

Professor Higgins and ELCA:
"Why Can't a Woman Be More Like a Man?"
Synodical Conference Mission Partners

Yesterday's satire is today's reality.


ALPB Forum
FWIW, 2 transgendered persons, Megan Rohrer and Jay Wilson, were ordained through ELM.  One of them, Megan (who was described as "queer" when ordained in 2006, but has the last couple of years been "the first openly transgender Lutheran pastor ordained in the United States") was among "Bay Area Seven" ELM clergy received into the ELCA last July.  If I recall rightly, Jay (who has not been received onto an ELCA roster) was among the partnered ELM folk included in one of Goodsoil's booklets for the last CWA.

The new ELCA policy speaks of "same gender" relationships.  Once a bisexual person makes a relationship commitment (marriage or PALMSGR), he/she is expected to keep it the same way any other ELCA rostered leader is expected to keep it (and presumedly the same for transgendered persons, though they aren't specifically mentioned in either the policy or the Social Statement).  The "LM" means "lifelong, monogamous."  Something our straight rostered leaders seem to have a problem with...


[To Pickering]
Pickering, why can't a woman be more like a man?
PICKERING
Hmm?
HIGGINS
Yes...
Why can't a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
Eternally noble, historic'ly fair;
Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat.
Well, why can't a woman be like that?
Why does ev'ryone do what the others do?
Can't a woman learn to use her head?
Why do they do ev'rything their mothers do?
Why don't they grow up- well, like their father instead?
Why can't a woman take after a man?
Men are so pleasant, so easy to please;
Whenever you are with them, you're always at ease.
Would you be slighted if I didn't speak for hours?
PICKERING
Of course not!
HIGGINS
Would you be livid if I had a drink or two?
PICKERING
Nonsense.
HIGGINS
Would you be wounded if I never sent you flowers?
PICKERING
Never.
HIGGINS
Well, why can't a woman be like you?
One man in a million may shout a bit.
Now and then there's one with slight defects;
One, perhaps, whose truthfulness you doubt a bit.
But by and large we are a marvelous sex!
Why can't a woman take after like a man?
Cause men are so friendly, good natured and kind.
A better companion you never will find.
If I were hours late for dinner, would you bellow?
PICKERING
Of course not!
HIGGINS
If I forgot your silly birthday, would you fuss?
PICKERING
Nonsense.
HIGGINS
Would you complain if I took out another fellow?
PICKERING
Never.